Burlington, VT-When Suzanne Jenkins bought a copy of Rhonda Byrne's international best seller The Secret, she had no idea that it would be the last book she'd ever read.
Ms. Jenkins was found dead in her home today, face down in several inches of water and crushed under the weight of literally thousands of brooms and buckets. A copy of The Secret was found clutched in her right hand. Police were mystified by the presence of arms on the brooms and a large axe. Chunks of wood were found on the blade of the axe but there was no evidence it played a role in her death.
"A year ago I could have said that I'd never seen anything like this before," Detective Mike Hollingsworth explained. "But scenes like this have become suprisingly common in the past ten months. And every time that book turns up somewhere."
Dr. George Grimsley, a psychic healer and expert in quantum mechanics, revealed that there is a perfectly reasonable explanation for occurences such as this. "Humans experience manifestations of reality that correspond to their intentional thoughts, feelings, words, and actions. Individuals therefore have direct control over their reality. This is the Law of Attraction, or the secret as it is known by lay people not familar with the the ins and outs of quantum theory. It's all in the book."