Thursday, October 17, 2013

Study Reveals Many Crop Circles Not Round.....

Wiltshire, England- Shocking the crowd of hundreds gathered today at the annual Crop Circle Research Symposium in Wiltshire, an international team of experts in the mysterious phenomenon announced the results of their year long investigation into the shape of crop circles.

"Despite what you may hear on the news, in popular magazine articles, or on The Learning Channel documentaries, many crop circles are simply not round," crop circle expert, and lead author of the landmark new study, Ham Willingsby IV explained. "This is something we've suspected in the crop circle research community for quite a while now, but having this kind of conclusive proof will allow us to move forward with several promising lines of research."

Crop circles, heretofore unexplained patterns found in fields of crops such as wheat and barley, that can be quite large and complex, have been documented for millennia in the historical record. Occurrences of these strange markings have increased over the past few decades, most likely because of increased extraterrestrial activity or genetic modifications of grain seeds. Monsanto is a company that I will mention because it is widely recognized and many people get very worked up over them, which may lead to more readers of this report.

Although unproven and less interesting to potential readers, the scientific consensus is that crop circles are predominantly man-made in origin, being produced as hoaxes or at times for the purpose of marketing. Leading theories that are more controversial and likely to bring in readers from Google searches who agree or disagree with them, are that crop circles are purposeful messages from visiting alien species, evidence of the planets intelligence or "Gaia", or plasma vortices.

So what is up next for this team of investigators? According to Willingsby IV, they will not limit themselves to only researching crop circles. "How large are Bigfoot's feet really? Does the Loch Ness Monster only reside in Loch Ness, and is it even really a monster or simply an aberrant miscreation? Do ghosts really shout "boo!" 


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