Health Blogger Calls for Diet Cola Warning Labels.....

Belvidere, NE- Mitch Rangler, the controversial advocateur, blogger and founder of The Health Patrol is calling for the placement of warning labels on diet colas containing what he claims are dangerous ingredients.

Controversial health blogger Mitch Rangler, shown here upset about immigrants or the cost of something these days.

"There is more than enough research to support the link between diet cola and a variety of health problems, like cancer, heart disease and obesity," Rangler revealed. "This stuff literally rots your brain from the inside out."

Potential graphical depiction of diet cola consumption side effects for use on proposed warning labels

The warning label would, according to Ranger and The Health Patrol, give consumers more autonomy when choosing which beverages are appropriate for consumption. It has the backing of both the Council of Supreme Nutritionology and the Enclave of Reform Nutrtitionologists. The specific wording was developed by a team of renowned and fully apprenticed Nutritionologists from around the world, but mostly hard to pronounce European cities like Mõisaküla and Cork:

"Warning: Drinking the concentrated evil within will rob you of your health and almost certainly be counted against you when the day of final judgement arrives."

Although Rangler is content with this label, he worries that it may not be enough. "We are talking about a public health tsunami that will claim more lives than actual tsunamis. And not everyone in America reads." Rangler is working on a series of graphical depictions of the harms of diet cola consumption for possible future inclusion on diet cola warning labels.