Friday, September 19, 2014

Gluten Attack Victim Speaks Out for First Time.....

Brookline, MA- The victim of a horrific gluten-based attack last weekend, a Brookline woman is now speaking out in the hope that lawmakers will enact measures to protect gluten sensitive citizens.

Mary Bort Perkland, shown here mere minutes after ingesting bread containing gluten
"What happened to me could have happened to anyone intolerant to gluten," Mary Bort Perkland explained. "I didn't ask to bear the weight of this affliction, but I do have to live with it every day of my life. Strict anti-gluten laws would have prevented this from happening."

Perkland, a citizen of Brookline since 1984 who was diagnosed with gluten sensitivity last year by a waitress at Otto Pizza on Harvard Avenue, was accosted by an unidentified assailant while at the 2014 Brookline Day festivities at Larz Anderson Park. The man, described by witnesses as tall for his weight and probably from New York, was last seen handing Perkland a sandwich made with wheat laden bread. He then disappeared in the chaos that ensued after the attack.

Perkland is calling for a complete ban of gluten in the city of Brookline, but plans to push for more broad reaching changes at the state and federal level. "I felt bloated and gassy for 3 days, and I'm still a bit foggy headed, but I'll recover. Others may not be so lucky. I'm fighting for them."

2 comments:

hoaiphai said...

These sorts of attacks are on the rise, apparently. In my area anxiety attacks are now common with people overly concerned that this coming winter just might be the worse ever, ever. Some are even convinced that it will cross the line from El NiƱo territory and get into the dreaded El Nunzio realm.

Zoo Knudsen said...

I knew a guy named Nunzio while covering the back beat for the Natick Gazelle. He was a fine reporter but fell in with a bad crowd and went from double trucks to the funnies. Some people blamed the booze, but I think his heart was too big for this business. Also he had an enlarged heart on account of his drinking.