Monday, June 12, 2017

Mean Baby Released into Parent Custody.....

Erie, PA-Erie native Sharonda Givens, who recently gave birth to an 8lb 7oz son via an uncomplicated vaginal delivery, alerted hospital staff that, based on the infant's crying during the initial attempt at breastfeeding, her baby was mean.
A mean baby, shown here with fist clenched in a blind rage, 
"That baby is mean!" Ms Givens explained. "He is mean. Why is he crying so much? Nobody is messing with him."

Child psychiatrist Mort Fishman MD, who was immediately consulted by the patient's pediatrician, expressed much concern after interviewing the baby and his mother. "Yes, in my professional opinion this baby is quite mean. At no point in my attempt to converse with him did he answer any of my questions. He was belligerent throughout the encounter, ceasing his crying only when being fed. This kind of narcissistic behavior is common in mean babies."

The baby, who will be discharged under continuous surveillance by local law enforcement, has been placed on a cocktail of benzodiazepines and anti-psychotic medications. He will also undergo weekly psychiatric evaluations until his attitude improves.

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