Washington, D.C. - Despite efforts to curb the practice, many Americans are still choosing to menstruate according to a recent study published in Conservative Surveys.
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| House Speaker Mike Johnson, shown here disappointed by a woman forgetting her place and voting to feed poor kids or some shit |
"Frankly the whole notion of a woman's monthly is something that I don't understand or feel comfortable talking about," House Speaker Mike Johnson explained. "What I do feel comfortable talking about, however, is how God demands a 7% sales tax on products manufactured specifically for dealing with it."
The new study, which consisted of asking random Republican lawmakers their thoughts on the process of discharging blood and other tissues from the lining of the uterus, is confusing conservative men in both chambers of Congress. According to Senator Chuck Grassley, the choice to menstruate is a personal matter that should be kept behind closed doors and preferably at home. "I don't want to have anything to do with something that follows a lunar cycle. That's witchcraft!"
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