Atlanta, GA - During a press conference held today at The Coca-Cola Company headquarters in Atlanta, global chief of communications Beatriz Perez announced plans for a complete overhaul of their popular line of Powerade sports drinks.
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| A white cisgender woman, shown here drinking a Mountain Berry Blast Powerade Woke after a tough workout and just prior to defunding all of the police |
"We are fully invested in speaking to and for a diverse population with our more inclusive product line," Perez explained. "And for anyone looking to protest systemic racism or challenge the patriarchy this Summer, Powerade Woke is the ideal way for the underrepresented and their allies to Cancel Dehydration™."
The Coca-Cola Company, who recently faced criticism from conservative politicians when they came out in opposition to a controversial Georgia voting law, are not the only corporation to implement product changes in response to societal shifts in awareness of social justice issues. Some experts, like Real America Group's social science chief Mumphrey Bobart, don't believe that these changes are based in genuine concern. "First it was that Ben & Jerry's MeTootti Frutti™ flavor and the Ruth Bader Ginsburger Meal® at McDonald's. Then Disneyland came out with the Black Lives Matterhorn ride last year. Now it's Powerade Woke? Can't you see it's all just marketing!"
Why doesn't Blogspot have a way to report marketing spam like Glen Maxy's "comment"? Anyway, another great post from Knudsen's News!
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