Thursday, January 24, 2008

More Academic Hospitals Embracing Alternative Janitorial Service.....

Embracing Alternative Cleaning
Top hospitals put unorthodox methods into practice

By Zoo Knudsen

"To be honest, if we didn't see and smell the difference, we would call the nurse's station and complain," says Sarah Saltzberg. She's referring to the freshly cleaned room of her son Timmy, who was recently diagnosed with childhood diabetes. Insulin shots, counting carbohydrates, and frequent checks of blood sugar levels have been vital aspects of Timmy's therapy, but equally important to his family is something very different from the harsh, time-consuming, and soundly studied methods of western cleaning.

The janitor has just peformed a kind of energy based cleaning from the realm of alternative janitorial services. Fast and lacking the typical pungent odors of more mainstream cleaning supplies, Quantum Cleaning takes advantage of the electron transitions associated with visible and ultraviolet interactions with trash, body fluids, and dirty linens where the quantum energy of photons precisely match the energy gap between the soiled and clean states. In the interaction of energy with matter, a Quantum Cleaning practitioner can elevate the quantum state from the lower to the upper state, rendering the matter void of any and all unclean quantum entanglements, thus rebalancing the energy field believed to envelop the room, leaving a fresh lemony scent. Each day, Janitor Clancy Simmons spends 5 to 10 minutes in Timmy's room, and according to the Saltzbergs "You could eat off the floor in here! We wouldn't though. Not really."

Just a few years ago, patients at Children's Memorial Hospital in Chicago would have seen janitors using only conventional evidence-based cleaning techniques. Like most facilities around the country, this research-oriented medical center, well known for its high ranking status amongst pediatric teaching hospitals, would have been full of brooms, mops, and a disinfectant wipes and sprays. But over the past few years, as can now be witnessed on a daily basis at Children's Memorial, more academic hospitals are embracing janitorial alternative methods, or JAM.

Children's Memorial is just one of a growing number of academic hospitals where irregular cleaning techniques have been put into use. Facilities like the Mayo Clinic, Duke University Medical Center, and the University of California-San Francisco are now replacing traditional methods with Quantum Cleaning and other JAM services. And Timmy is only one of many children benefitting from room cleaning that not long ago was considered by mainstream academic research janitors to be unfounded and ineffective. But a growing body of evidence, such as a recent study revealing that more than half of Americans seek alternative cleaning services each year, and a case report from Janitor Monthly describing the use of a homeopathic ammonia solution to remove dust from hospital window blinds, have gotten the attention of these premier institutions.

But JAM services have their skeptics, such as Columbia Nephrologist Steve Novelette, who is concerned that academic hospitals may be doing the country a disservice. "There are janitorial services that work and janitorial services that don't work," Novelette explains. "There is.....evidence.....majority.....studies show.....JAM services work."

Back at Children's Memorial, Timmy is sleeping soundly and Clancy Simmons is going about his work of providing a clean and comfortable environment for children and their families to heal. "I wait until nobody's in the room and the kid is asleep, then I just clean up real fast. Some people will believe anything."

26 comments:

The Laundress said...

Dear Mr. Knudsen,

You have finally addressed a topic that I can understand (I think).

JAM is the way of the future. It is my future.

I am hoping you will devote further coverage to alternative cleaning methods i.e. laundry balls.

If you have the...

um, nevermind.

your devoted,
Ms. Laundress

Scotty B said...

This is satire, right?

Anonymous said...

This is not new. Many young bachelors (including myself in my day) have discovered the merits of alternative cleaning. Why did the world take so long to catch up?

Sid Schwab said...

Of late, I've been using Reiki to cook my dinners. It saves loads on energy bills; plus, I've always liked my steaks pretty rare. I'm glad to see alternatives applied to more than just curing cancer, since that's pretty much a done deal.

Anonymous said...

"...elevate the quantum state from the lower to the upper state, rendering the matter void of any and all unclean quantum entanglements, thus rebalancing the energy field believed to envelop the room, leaving a fresh lemony scent."

HOGWASH Quantum WHAT? Entanglement? This smells fishy, not lemony. I prefer the evidence based cleaners derided earlier in the article. Evidence not hogwash throwing around of pseudoscientific terminology to gain acceptance.

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Janna said...

thanks!

Gail said...

Hospitals should be the places that must be cleaned and sanitized every day. People go there to be well but if the facilities are not that clean, bacteria easily penetrate them. So, instead of becoming well, the status becomes worse. Good thing that hospital of this era venture with new and innovative janitorial services Minneapolis.

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kalvinfrnk said...

I'm glad to see alternatives applied to more than just curing cancer, since that's pretty much a done deal. hospital cleaning supplies

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Sophie Mortimer said...

This sounds like something from a movie. Does it really work as cleanly and efficiently as you say? My restaurant has a standard janitorial service that we have come in every night, but it takes a few hours to clean everything up on top of the cleaning our employees do. Would this Quantum Cleaning be adaptable to food service? Thanks for the post! I'm excited to do more research.

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