Monday, April 28, 2008

New Documentary Links Darwinism to Reality Television.....

Seatlle, WA-Fresh on the heals of the controversial documentary Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed, which attempts to blame the mass slaughter of millions of Jews during the Holocaust on Darwinism, a new film set to be released next month seeks to link the rise of reality television to the underlying concepts of evolution and natural selection as put forth by Charles Darwin.

"Our film starts by exposing the weaknesses inherent in Darwinism, weaknesses that have never been addressed by Darwinists such as the lack of videotape evidence of speciation occuring in real-time," director Nirk Davenport explains. "We go on to show that the blueprint for what has become reality television is rooted in Darwinism and one need look no further than shows like Flavor of Love and Farmer Needs a Wife to see how Darwinsim is wearing away the moral foundation of our society."

The makers of the film further contend that "Big Reality" suppresses criticism and claim that writers who believe that there might be a place for "Intelligent Scripting" in the reality genre are being persecuted for these beliefs. "If a writer approaches a network about a scripted reality program, where everything is created and planned beforehand with the outcomes already known, those executives are going to say that they don't belong in the reality television business," host Wallace Shawn reveals. "This is America right?"

The producers and writers of the film, as well as Davenport and Wallace, recently held an invitation only discussion amongst themselves over the content of the film that was open to select members of the press who had passed a background check and polygraph testing. Their conclusion was that the film is valid and beyond reproach. The film was funded with taxpayer dollars through the White House Office of Faith-Based and Community Initiatives and viewing has been declared mandatory under penalty of treason.

Critics of the film, all Darwin worshipping atheist supporters of reality television programs like Moment of Truth and Temptation Island, have already made efforts to suppress the ideas put forth in the new documentary. One covert operation involving a number of Darwinists, disguised as moral United States citizens, was foiled by a gaurd cleverly placed outside of the theater to check IDs against a guest list obtained from the online forms used to sign up for the free public screening. Tactics such as this have so far assured that all persons holding opinions contrary to those espoused in the film have been kept from unfairly distracting potential moviegoers.

3 comments:

G Felis said...

Very funny, but I protest your choice of Wallace Shawn as your spoof Ben Stein. Ben Stein is demonstrably an unlikable idiot who knows absolutely nothing about science, or even his supposed areas of expertise like politics and economics. In contrast, Wallace Shawn is funny and charming. It is inconceivable - INCONCEIVABLE I say! - that you would tar him with the stinky brush of Stein.

Anonymous said...

Treason is a crime, not a penalty.

Funny, though.

Zoo Knudsen said...

I've got a number of lawyers on staff, some of which have taken the Bar exam multiple times so I'm pretty sure they know what they are talking about.