Wednesday, May 28, 2008

New Rating System Helps Parents Avoid Autism.....

Upper Saddle River, NJ-In her ceaseless effort to rid the world of autism, Jenny McCarthy announced today that she has developed a new rating system for products that will serve to better educate consumers interested in protecting their children from the dreaded toxin induced condition.

"There isn't a big focus on autism in the medical field right now," McCarthy explained during a Talk About Curing Autism (TACA) gathering today. "It is up to us, the mother warriors, to fight for the health of our children and this new system is the perfect way for busy shoppers to reduce any unnecessary risk of their children developing autism!"

Beginning next month, the 5-star Autism Risk Assessment Score (ARAS) will be seen on products ranging from toothpaste to talcum powder, as well as on individual and combination vaccines, making comparison shopping for autism conscious buyers and healthcare consumers, like architect and mother of three Brenda Kern, possible for the first time. "Finally I can work autism avoidance into my hectic daily schedule without all of the hours of research on google or asking our pediatrician!"

For a malady so complex, the rating system is suprisingly easy to master according to McCarthy, who nearly graduated from Southern Illinois University. "If you see five stars on a Chinese made teething ring or a vaccine insert, it causes autism plain and simple. Five stars means that the overwhelming weight of the scientific evidence falls on the side of it directly leading to autism with perhaps only a few minor holdouts, like the CDC or the FDA, remaining in disagreement."

McCarthy adds that a one star rating, which means that a product has not been shown to cause autism, isn't written in stone. "Just because we don't think it causes autism now, doesn't mean that we won't decide that it does at some point in the future. That's how science works."

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wake Up Jenny McCarthy there are Father Warriors out there fighting Autism just as hard as Mother Warriors! Great idea about the rating system lets hope a manufacturing lawsuit doesn't delay the widespread adoption of this standard.

Joshua said...

"the overwhelming weight of the scientific evidence falls on the side of it directly leading to autism with perhaps only a few minor holdouts, like the CDC or the FDA, remaining in disagreement." Wow, I don't know what to make of that. Does she really how idiotic that part about the CDC sounds? If one wanted any further evidence that McCarthy doesn't understand how science works either in theory or practice that's probably enough.

Flit said...

Doesn't a five star rating typically indicate that something is very good? I'm sure using it to mean 'really bad' won't confuse anyone.

Although if they are basing the ratings on "the overwhelming weight of the scientific evidence" then can't they can just put one star on every product?

Zoo Knudsen said...

All you reductionists think alike. When you start realizing that maybe there is more to a rating system than what your naturalistic dogma dictiates, then you will come to understand the genius inherent in McCarthy's system.

Anonymous said...

There is no hard and fast evidence that autism is a "toxin induced condition". I'm a psychlogist who specializes in children with autism and this may be the worst article (if it's not a gag) that I've ever read. We can't quantify at this point whether or not a certain teething ring or chemical compound causes autism. It has not been determined if it is hereditary or chemically linked. There is some clout that certain vaccinations may be linked to autism but nothing is certain yet. Please take Jenny McCarthy with a grain of salt. It is possible to greatly improve the communication and social skills of a child with autism, but it is through early intervention and not through diet or McCarthy Vitamins.

Alex Horton said...

Go to Hell, Knudsen and commenters.