Dearborn, MI-When Dearborn optometrist Jim Grimley quietly remarked under his breath how fat girlfriend Angelle Balhoff looked in a new dress as she walked out of their bedroom yesterday afternoon, the last thing he expected was for her to turn around and ask what he had just said.
"She kept asking how she looked, and if I thought that the dress was fancy enough for some stupid office party we were going to last night," Grimley explained. "I told her, like a million times, that she looked fine and all I kept thinking was how I was missing the Michigan State game and how fat she looked. I can't believe she heard me. I mean, she's got like bat ears or something. It's just uncanny. She's pretty pissed now but she'll hop back on board the Grimley express in no time."
When approached for comment, the visibly shaken Balhoff expressed remorse over the events. "I'm sorry for just wanting to look pretty for one night. I mean, is it too much to ask for a night out of the house where nobody farts or yells at their Playstation."
Update: According to sources inside the home, it has now been confirmed that Ms. Balhoff has reboarded the Grimley express.
Monday, March 10, 2008
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7 comments:
You're a weirdo.
hugs and kisses,
Not Charlie
Zoo...don't know what to say.
How about congratulations on your Pulitzer Mr. Knudsen.
Congratulations on your Pulitzer Mr. Knudsen! Can I come to your party?
your never-farting but always yelling fan of the PS-3 platform...
anonymous
uh huh.
And, dewd, I sure as hell hope that ain't your pregnant wife that you are dissin' here...
a theme song:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=seuwhZvXa6Y
If my wife is pregnant, it isn't mine. My boys haven't swum in years. At least not in a straight line. More circular. My naturopath says it's all the aluminum in my diet.
Mr. Knudsen,
don't panic, but you do know that an aluminum-rich diet is the primary cause of that pesky Alzheimer's right? Handy laundress tip: gargling with the graywater from your washing machine rinse cycle* will counteract the harmful effects of aluminum cookware and/or swilling of TAB colas...
assuming you are using laundry balls, of course!!
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