Thursday, October 31, 2013

Local Women Ends Childhood Obesity Epidemic by Handing Out Raisins on Halloween.....

Brookline, MA- Taking a stand against childhood obesity, Brookline resident Jan Stilton will be handing out raisins this Halloween instead of candy.

"With so many people unhealthy and obese, and many of them young children, it's time somebody took a stand," Stilton explained. "If more people took action instead of just going along with the crowd, the world would be a better place! And raisins are nature's candy."

Obesity researchers, like Harvard's Elsie Taveras, have been waiting for a hero like Stilton to emerge. "Obesity is a major public health issue, and something that negatively impacts the health of millions of children. It's a complicated problem with myriad influences. Thankfully, its all about to be in the past."

The certain success of Stilton's campaign to end childhood obesity is already inspiring regular citizens all over the country to accomplish what the government and egghead scientists can't. We've only just received a report from downtown New Orleans that 54-year-old engineer Mark Foreman has loudly and purposefully had an exaggerated coughing fit as two smokers walked by him at a bus stop, thus ending tobacco's grip on the populace.

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