Reeling Salt Water Industry Hires PR Firm to Improve Image.....

Cranston, RI - After decades of stagnant sales outside of industrial markets, and a series of colossal public relations disasters, the saltwater industry is hiring the prestigious Howell & Jolly public relations firm for help improving its image.

Josh Brolin, shown here holding his pet wahoo, isn't just the spokesperson for salt water, he's uses it every day

"15 percent of all the water used in the United States is salt water," Howell & Jolly publicist Fran Weatherbee explained. "We know that people are using it, they just aren't speaking up. We recognize the hit that salt water has taken from the 2011 disaster at the Fukushima Daiichi nuclear power plant, and of course Hurricane Ida in 2021, but we are poised to make a big comeback."

Howell & Jolly recently issued a press release discussing a series of television and radio ads, as well as increased product placements in movies and television programs geared towards increasing public awareness. They have hired actor Josh Brolin, star of such high profile hits as The Goonies, Thrashin', and No Country for Old Men, as well as the voice of Thermos in the popular children's movie The Half Empty Thermos on the Island of Make Believe Magic, to serve as a spokesperson for the industry. They are counting on the award winning actor to reach a broader range of potential consumers.

"Until now, roughly 92% of saltwater has been used to cool thermoelectric-power industry equipment," Brolin revealed during a recent interview on Fresh Air with Terry Gross. "Now don't get me wrong, that's an important service. I mean, let's see Vitaminwater cool a power plant or crack shale! But when you look deeper and really peel that onion, there is just a lot more there."

The salt water industry is hoping that the Oscar-nominated Brolin will give the ailing liquid's image a boost. In one ad, set to begin appearing on buses in most major American cities this month, an image of the Jonah Hex star in cowboy attire appears above the quote, "I like my movies to have heart, my women fire, and my water, well, I like my water with a little salt."