Sedona, AZ - As Americans face increasing rates of a obesity, mental health problems, and a variety of chronic illnesses, more experts are beginning to recognize extradimensional influences on human health.
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| Extradimensional medicine practitioner Mary Panda, shown here using a focusing wand to center a patient in the physical realm in order to discuss payment options |
"Take inflammatory bowel disease for example," Panda Center for Extradimensional Medicine founder Mary Panda, MD explained. "Patients may experience diarrhea, abdominal pain, and mouth sores with the limited awareness from their physical senses, but we treat the whole entity on every plane of existence and even when the source of their problems exists outside of any plane or dimension."
Modern extradimensional medicine, which practitioners admit is still in its infancy, does have some vocal critics. According to conventional 3+1 dimensional internal medicine doctor Mort Fishman, MD, skepticism is warranted. "Where is the basic science behind this? Where are the randomized controlled trials? I think we should stick to diagnosing and treating our patients within the confines of the spacetime continuum in order to avoid any unforeseen challenges, such as accidentally opening a portal that a chaos demon could just walk right through. Is that what you want? A chaos demon...here?"
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