Thursday, December 4, 2014

Sears Photographer Unable to Calm Crying Infant.....

Lafayette, LA-Despite a weekend training course and several weeks of real world experience in the use of hand puppets and key jingling, Sears photographer JoAnne Milton was unable to stop 3-month-old Jessica Ayer's crying long enough to take a family portrait.

Jessica Ayers, shown here just prior to becoming a vessel for the Dark Lord Satan
"I just don't know what happened in there," Ms. Milton explained to the select panel of government officials and representatives of the Catholic church gathered in the nearby housewares department. "The baby wasn't responding to anything. Not even Cuddly Bear. It's like she's some kind of demon or something. It isn't right, that's for sure!"

After a thorough investigation by store management, and a conference call with Pope Francis, it will be decided what the next course of action will be. Store manager Ray Geddes was unwilling to speculate as to whether the Ayer's would receive a full cash refund or store credit, however he did state that "first and foremost we are worried about that baby's soul."

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